It is most often in this stage that people get stuck.
Idealization of your partner diminishes and you begin to see who your partner really is — and they begin to see you.
Both people feel fulfilled and cared for by the other person. The only way to obtain mature love is to work through the previous stages: there are no shortcuts.
In this stage you and your partner know each other at a deep and intrinsic level.
All three involve very different emotional states, so they require an adjustment with each transition. Romantic Love You are driven in this stage to idealize your potential partner. The novelty of a new love leads you to think about your partner day and night, imagining all the possibilities of how this person can fulfill your deepest desires.
You want to spend every moment of every day with your new partner in the bliss of newly discovered love.
Romantic love is the fodder of Hollywood movies and stories.You know your own desires and wounds, and you choose to accept your partner’s desires and wounds in turn.In other words, you have each other’s backs — for better or worse. Each stage of love is wrought with mistakes; the important thing is that the two of you commit to working through the mistakes and build safety together.In actuality, this is when the real relationship story begins.There are several stages that relationships go through over time, but most of us want the happily ever after — and believe our relationship should be easy. Satisfying, mature, relationships happen when both people work hard to maintain a sense of safety with each other.Here, you should remember the saying, “If it’s too good to be true it usually is.” There’s a reason for this adage.In this stage of romance, your brain is not able to access and incorporate red flags, or flaws in your potential partner.They live for years with blame, resentment and hurt before they seek help.Sometimes one partner is doing all the work to keep the relationship together and ultimately this strategy results in feeling depleted and frustrated.You will begin to feel resentful, and resort to blaming your partner for your unmet needs. If you feel this is you, contact a marriage counselor sooner rather than later.In my experience, couples wait too long to seek counseling.