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"You can design a bot to fool fraud detection." But, in the case of a number of dating sites, developers aren't trying to weed out fake profiles — they are tirelessly writing scripts and algorithms to unleash more of them.

It’s the dirtiest secret of the billion online dating business and it stretches far beyond Ashley Madison.

See how the relationship unfolds and revisit that list often.

We think we have to deal with rejection, but they've had it 100 times worse."It's about reacquainting yourself with who you are today and what value you hold in a partnership," she said. The internal list we all have that makes finding your perfect partner as hard as lassoing a unicorn."A lot of people are still holding on to the old vision of themselves." 2. But holding on to that impossible list isn't fair to you or the men you date, Palmer said.The relationship expert shared her six-step plan to help women start dating like a grown-up. If you find yourself dating again in your 50s, chances are a major life event -- whether it be divorce or losing your loved one -- has given you quite the beating.Tell us what you think of her advice -- and your own experiences dating after 50 -- in the comments below. So before you rush out looking for love again, it's important to be ok with who you are, said Palmer."It's about being intellectual with your beliefs and realizing they aren't true," instead of being completely emotional, she said. Whether it's getting online (which is how Palmer met her husband), classes, or social meetups for post 50s, "get out of your house, because a lot of us do the same routine everyday at [this] point in our lives," she said."We need to be proactive in going places where you're going to potentially meet eligible men." Once you've reeled in a man of interest, there are a few things the mature woman dating over 50 needs to know.When he saw an ad for the dating site Ashley Madison, which boasted 36 million members and the tagline, "Life is short, have an affair," he decided to check it out. Everyday, he received more of these come-ons — until he finally said, "Fuck it." "I'm like, ' Hey, all these women want to talk with me,'" he recalls. As anyone who's dated online knows, this is not entirely unusual. "I just figured they're not interested anymore," Russell says."' Let me go ahead and put in my credit card information.'"Russell paid 0 for 1,000 credits, which he could spend on sending replies or virtual gifts. After a few months of rejection, he didn't bother to log back on Ashley Madison again.For all the positive stories of long lost loves and happily married couples we post on Huff/Post50, we know that many are finding themselves back in the dating game for the first time in years.While you would think your age would translate into mature dating experiences, many women (and men) find themselves reliving their teen years when it comes to the dating world.

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